I urgently had to get to the cafe yesterday where I do a lot of my writing. It was busy because the wind outside was cold, the energy inside was enormous! I had no idea which project I was about to embark on as I opened my laptop and took a sip of my warm sweet latte.
I started with S.E.L.F (my writing tool that I have begun) and reread the piece that I wrote whilst on my road trip;
Sharon had been hiding in the cellar, she was petrified that the world would judge her and so she locked herself away. The lack of light had stunted her growth and she had regressed into a little girl, she thought this was her power and so this was the persona she threw out to the world. However it was time for her to grow up and become a woman and so she decided to open the door from the cellar. As she climbed the thirteen steps the light hit her and immediatly she grew. Like a new born she couldn’t see properly for a while, it took time for her eyes to adjust to this different perspective. It took months not weeks before she could stand tall again but one day she looked into the mirror and recognised the reflection, she smiled her eyes wider than ever before.
Immediately it evoked huge emotion and I realised that it was time to plan my Sexpo talk. The characters that I arrived at from Jung’s Individuation Process are so dear to me I cannot wait to share them. If just one person at the talk can relate, understand, smile, laugh or even hate one of my characters or me I feel I will have done my job. I just want to entice people’s emotional openness.
As I have said before I have never spoken to more than about ten people in a room so this is going to be an amazing experience. At first I was nervous but now I can’t wait, it won’t be perfect and I’ll stumble but I’m starting to realise that is my strength. I don’t mind people watching me clown around trying to find my feet if it makes them smile, laugh and feel better about themselves. I reckon even if people are laughing at me it means they are growing and have taken me into their heart. If they are anything like me, their brain will catch up eventually.