A spilt pot of black ink
Covers your soul
Gone in a blink
Then back with a blow
This weapon is heavy and strong and true
A friend you thought, a part of you
Then it is dashed
And reality changes
Light has entered
The darkness endangered
writing
Writing Workshops 2017
Noosa
I was trying third person writing whilst away this July in Noosa. I didn’t publish it at the time because I didn’t like it but it’s grown on me a bit more now.
Noosa
He walked along the shoreline looking out onto the river, under the surface of the water he knew the fish were territorial. The flat glass surface reflecting the suns glinting rays however showed no sign of this underworld. Just as the pretty girls that walked the riverside their bodies happily bouncing showed no signs of the venom that Tom had experienced. No sign at all on their beautiful faces or their long smooth legs. They should come with warning signs! thought Tom.
Jules had been his latest jilter. Tom was a tall lad 6ft 3, broad shoulders and an even broader smile. Girls fell for him even before he opened his mouth and his Irish lilt spilled out, showering their small pretty ears with gifts of kindness and compliments. The problem was that Tom would bestow these kind gifts on anyone and everyone. They were not precious stones only occasionally found glinting in the sun, they were showers of light that would pour out of him. Sharing was his gift, he knew no other way. At first a beautiful sight but all too soon the receiver of these gems would want them all to herself, would want the sharing to stop.
These wonderful women didn’t think he would stick around. The next pretty girls head to turn was after all just across the road or serving him his next skinny cap.
Noosa was a seasonal resort and Tom hadn’t yet suffered a summer when the stifling heat was like wading through a sickly sweet soup. Tom was a dreamer and the next road trip had always been just a pay check away until now. He had fallen for Jules and had spent slow Sexy evenings sharing wine by the river, wrapping her up in soft blankets so that his hands could wander free.
He had also fallen for Noosa, the river had a vibe of its own different to the beach and the buzz of Main Street. He could easily settle here. What he had failed to tell Jules was that he had citizenship and could stay wherever he chose but he didn’t want her to know, he didn’t want to give anyone that power again and so Toms vicious circle kept turning, except this time he had found its axis.
A Curiously Normal Sexpo
Whilst arriving at Sexpo this weekend with my subject of sexual liberation I couldn’t help thinking of comparisons of my book with a certain Shades of Grey, obviously I’m happy about being compared to a book that has become a multimillion dollar business. In the back of my mind I was thinking how the ‘Grey’ books have changed erotic fiction and people’s acceptance of it, did I need to be at Sexpo? Surely sexy fiction is mainstream now? Maybe it is but liberation certainly isn’t as I found out almost immediately.
A Wonderful Life
Another amazing week took place and I realised that this isn’t just another amazing week. This is the start of my career as a writer, this is the start of my wonderful life.
Having my book in print is so empowering, being an author is now tangible and not just a product of cyberspace, it is in my hand. The essence of my story is what counts just like all stories. It is the heart that tells the story, not the brain. The fingers can fumble around messing up the letters and punctuation but the heart is what you hear. That’s if you are really listening of course.
I joined a new writers group last week and again I found myself surrounded by Amazing people. Most writers, (personally I believe the ones that are any good) wear their heart on their sleeve. Even when the beat slows, stumbles, races or misses it can still be heard.
Sharing is a writers arrow so I do think it is rather appropriate that my first gig is at the S.H.A.R.E seminar room at Sexpo, I can’t wait. The world is open, my book is open and so is my heart.
Let’s share.
Games of Love
Games People Play is a book I enjoyed reading whilst I was studying. Berne explores transactional analysis by way of the parent, adult and child. I on the other hand decided to take a slightly broader look at who my characters chose as partners, their parent, child or equal.
Lets start with Milla, she thinks she wants a parent to look after her and so looks for men with power unfortunately it soon becomes clear that she will always be the victim in this situation. Then along comes Tabatha, she doesn’t control Milla, she lays back and enjoys Milla’s courage. Tabatha is strong enough to be her equal and so neither has to fall into the victim persona.
Stacey is the mum in all aspects of her life and craves to be the child, the one who is looked after. She doesn’t want to give her power up completely and so this relationship can only ever be casual, this way she is still in control of her life and others.
Sharon has succumb to her child fantasies with Lenny, as he worships her and keeps her captive. Her fun in the cellar has fueled her power and now she wants to explore the world and needs a more experienced ‘Daddy’ to lead her, Harry gladly accepts her hand.
Tabatha wants to play the adult so badly she is striving for this, to be the best she can be and takes every opportunity. When she realises that Rick wants a parent she looks elsewhere, she doesn’t want that responsibility because she knows it will weigh her down.
So what role is Harry playing? The parent to them all, he loves the power and for a while he relies on his equal at home, his wife Lin but what happens when he has no equal? When Lin decides it is her time to grow and not be held back by her ‘child’ Harry’s world starts to fall apart, no one has his back any more and he starts to slowly unravel. Will Sharon be able to take on the role, is she strong enough? Or will Harry finally take control of his life, his emotions and himself.
What game are you playing? Is it your best?
My novel Sharks & Lovers is available here; Amazon, iBooks, Kobo
Urgent Writing from my Shadow
I urgently had to get to the cafe yesterday where I do a lot of my writing. It was busy because the wind outside was cold, the energy inside was enormous! I had no idea which project I was about to embark on as I opened my laptop and took a sip of my warm sweet latte.
I started with S.E.L.F (my writing tool that I have begun) and reread the piece that I wrote whilst on my road trip;
Sharon had been hiding in the cellar, she was petrified that the world would judge her and so she locked herself away. The lack of light had stunted her growth and she had regressed into a little girl, she thought this was her power and so this was the persona she threw out to the world. However it was time for her to grow up and become a woman and so she decided to open the door from the cellar. As she climbed the thirteen steps the light hit her and immediatly she grew. Like a new born she couldn’t see properly for a while, it took time for her eyes to adjust to this different perspective. It took months not weeks before she could stand tall again but one day she looked into the mirror and recognised the reflection, she smiled her eyes wider than ever before.
Immediately it evoked huge emotion and I realised that it was time to plan my Sexpo talk. The characters that I arrived at from Jung’s Individuation Process are so dear to me I cannot wait to share them. If just one person at the talk can relate, understand, smile, laugh or even hate one of my characters or me I feel I will have done my job. I just want to entice people’s emotional openness.
As I have said before I have never spoken to more than about ten people in a room so this is going to be an amazing experience. At first I was nervous but now I can’t wait, it won’t be perfect and I’ll stumble but I’m starting to realise that is my strength. I don’t mind people watching me clown around trying to find my feet if it makes them smile, laugh and feel better about themselves. I reckon even if people are laughing at me it means they are growing and have taken me into their heart. If they are anything like me, their brain will catch up eventually.
A Little Chaos
“A light honest scent, natural and unforced, some of the roses here seem faded and overgrown.
That fate awaits all roses Sire. All roses are open to the elements your majesty they bud, bloom and fade. The rose grows entirely unaware changing naturally from one state to another and although the elements may treat her cruelly she knows nothing of it and continues to her end without judgement on her beauty. Alas it is not the same for us.
If such a rose could speak what would she say?
Yes I am here and gave service under natures eye and after me my children will be. Is there any greater contribution or more graceful end?
A wise rose. And what protection can a gardner afford this rose from the harsh elements of change?
Patience, care and a little warmth from the sun are our best hope your majesty.”
Kate Winslet and Alan Rickmans exchange at court in A Little Chaos. A beautifully written film.
An Inspiration
His arms were huge, his hair was blonde and his smile shone brightly as he welcomed the passengers aboard the ferry to Manly.
The heat was heroic at Circular Quay but the rain came down as we gazed towards the sea.
The Manly man will arrive one day in fiction or fact but that for now is a different act.
Selling smiles and strength to the passengers of harbour life is where he can be found today.
Say hello and let him know what a wonderful job he is doing. An inspiration taken for granted by many.
Exercise Your Demons
Before They Exercise You
Enjoy all of your SELF because only the stifled emotions will push back harder. Wallow in the pain, feel the emotions that you want to hide, let them out. Don’t throw daggers at yourself throw love in abundance because it will stick eventually.
Embrace all of your characters, love them and let them grow, let them see the light. Prune them and then let them grow up perhaps up, up and away. Maybe up, up and within making you stronger. Wherever they go acknowledge them because they are or were a big part of you.
There is nothing within your SELF that you cannot understand because you experienced it and chose to keep hold of it. What did it teach you? What invaluable lesson did you learn? Pretty clever aren’t you, teaching yourself these lessons of life?
My novel Sharks and Lovers is available at Amazon Kobo and iBooks