Do you ever feel as if you are trying to evolve too quickly? Trying to pack so much into your day, your week, your life? It’s obviously growth but also sometimes bloody exhausting! Accepting more challenges and diving in head first even without knowing how deep the water is, would you call that faith or stupidity? I’ll go with faith, all be it blind! Accepting the artists residency with Sci-artist Ben Beeton was no exception to the rule, dive in head first, worry about how deep the water is later. It turns out it was a cool pool of azure calmness, quite the opposite to the intense heat that Queensland can sometimes offer!
The flight was delayed and so trying to take my mind of the impending fright of flying, I started to read my NLP book and found a fabulous diagram that I just had to rewrite in order to create some learning and positivity. I am enjoying this book no end, I mean (change of language) I am enjoying this book immensely! I decided I would program myself into a positive state of mind and it worked. I could have flown that plane to Brisbane by the time we boarded, it was all going so well, until the descent.
Ben and I have tried on occasion to collaborate our creative passions but so far fell short so I was interested to see what we would be talking about this time and surely a collaboration would be so much easier when in the same state, literally!
Leaving the plane the beautiful warm air hit me and changed my mindset of ifs, buts and maybe’s. Brisbane airport is full of happiness, bronzed bodies who have just wallowed in the sunshine or those who are returning to the warmth. Off I went in search of The Withcott Hills, my creative residence for the next five days, excited to discover somewhere new.
My last visit to Brisbane had been a four day, 500 meter continuous loop from hotel to exhibition center (Sexpo) and so to finally see some of Brisbane’s surrounds quenched my thirst for this beautiful country. I still pinch myself that I can call Australia home!
It was dusk as I arrived to the top of a dark mountain with fairy lights illuminating the steps down to Ben’s house, I found a glass of wine was soon in hand whilst we sat in the fernery discussing our projects, past, present and future. Ben has so many ideas it will be interesting to see which of our collaborative projects becomes fruitful, we have at least two to go with so far which will be revealed in time.
I woke around 3am on my first night; always a sign I am raring to write! I decided to start work on a story I have wanted to write for a very long time; my childhood growing up in a sweet factory, I worked there in school holidays as it was our family business. My Grandad, in my opinion had the attitude from the Victorian era, children should be seen and not heard, or in my case children should be seen to work hard and not make any mistakes. He softened later in life and I grew to admire him greatly but as a small child he scared the absolute crap out of me! There were many great characters that worked there from huge burly men carrying ginormous basins of steaming hot glucose, to pretty girls in their stripey aprons wrapping rock, it wasn’t Charlie and the Chocolate factory, it was better because this was reality! I cannot wait to fictionalise my memories and embark on a new literary experience. By the time I left Brisbane all thirteen characters were talking to each other which is such a great psychological place for a writer, there are no thoughts just flow through your fingertips, words appearing in front of your eyes.
The next morning a wonderful walk through the bush land that surrounds the house was awesome, and the breeze that swept up the mountain kept us cool, for the most part! Ben explained that the water had carved out the rock and this was a Jurassic flood plain, Table Mountain (Queensland) had once been a functioning volcano. If a dinosaur had of crept past at any point I don’t think I would of blinked, it certainly looked like a habitat made for them, not us! Huge boulders, sheer cliff edges and forest as far as the eye could see.
I ate my dinner sitting on the deck looking straight out to the wilderness watching the flickering of the sun, bouncing shards of light sailing through the trees. Texts from my Mum in France were giving me great incites into our family business that of course I will try and thread through my new project isn’t it great when the family history book opens up?
I woke up at 7.00am on the 7th and was inspired to write about the love in my life. Love is always at the forefront of my mind, from family and friends, my beautiful children, to the squeeze in my bed that lingers in my head. Whilst I am beginning to accept that logic plays a big part in the world (especially when spending time with a scientist!) whilst I am writing, here and full of love and fictional fancies my mind can be set free from the constraints that day to day life encourages. It was astonishing then that realism and critic turned up and I was able to look at a personal situation through strong clear eyes, it wasn’t why I came here at all, inspiration for new projects was my reasoning. However getting away really is what we all need on occasions when we feel like the decisions of adulthood are so hard to make we just want to hide under the covers. I think a place where any one going through a divorce has probably taken shelter but hey that really is another story!
I walked into town to grab a coffee, yes down this huge mountain and then back up, I scrambled over boulders, slide down a few and ended up in someone’s garden, luckily Queenslanders are extremely friendly folk and finding a sweaty Pom in their backyard seemed like no surprise at all. I decided to take the road after that!
Hiking back up I realised there really are no mountains physically or mentally that we cannot overcome, we just need to keep putting one foot in front of the other, which on the fourth day proved slightly more difficult when I chose lunch time to do my mountain walk. I still survived the boiling hot sun beating down on my back as I scaled the near vertical hillside, however a better choice to go earlier in the day would have been wiser.
And so here I am experiencing all of my emotions at full throttle, my love of writing and the constant flow; the perfect way to write. The inventiveness and discovery of a new self, some realism and clarity about my future. An abundance of love for those closest to me and most importantly love for myself, happiness for where I am, physically, psychologically, emotionally and spiritually.
Ben thought that I was staying for another five days, goodness only knows what would happen then! Thank you so much Ben Beeton for enriching this girls life and creativity and for hosting my first residency. Hopefully the first of many!
Ben Beeton can be found at any of the following websites and also in the middle of nowhere inspiring and creating.