It was a normal pick up from school, I was as usual listening to the music in the car and then unusually I was masked, standing my restricted distance from the school, the gate and any other human! I noticed my daughter was walking quickly and when we got inside the car I expected the usual tirade about annoying boys, which happened, I listened and we laughed, then sang along to Pink.
The next day on the way to school it all came out; ‘there was a man at the school gate yesterday and he was smiling at me, he didn’t take his eyes off me and made me feel uncomfortable.’
‘he didn’t take his eyes off me and made me feel uncomfortable’ This made my stomach tighten and my eyes sharpen as we pulled up to the school. Any 10 year old uttering those words needs to be heard. I told her that her gut feeling was right and that is what to listen to. She got out of the car and I walked her to the gate, a lioness protecting her cub. I told her I would get there early tonight and would keep an eye out.
The most terrifying thing about this in my mind after alerting the school was the sinking knowledge that this was another parent. There was very little to be done. I kept the communication open with my daughter and watched her closely. For the next week the deputy head walked up and down the gate as the children left waving and smiling at me and I wondered how many times this had happened before. It didn’t happen again.
For those who think that this wouldn’t happen at ‘their school’ or to ‘their children, and it only happens to others, wake up! As women we know when someone makes us feel uncomfortable whether we are 10 or 85.
My family live in a wonderful community in beautiful sunny Melbourne but we still need to be wary and alert.
One in four children has an abuser at arms length! Unfortunately they don’t look like monsters, have horns or fangs. They are just like you and me, they can be kind, happy and loving but they can also be the terrible change in your child’s innocent life.
Over 45% of females have been abused by the time they turn 18 and that figure is just the reported cases. I believe the figures are similar for males.
Be aware, Be Safe and most importantly as a parent be approachable to your children about every subject even the difficult ones. There’s some interesting information below.
Great work Mumma Bear ,
This is one of the most insidious depravities in our society .
The far reaching effects on the victims life’s is immeasurable ,and as you say , rarely ever addressed from a justice perspective , not to mention the silent societal dysfunction that permeates our community’s and affects families sometimes for generations , while the perpetrators carry on with their lives , often slithering around undetected under a cloak of normality or acceptability 😒 quite often in positions of authority and/or power